Not Fair!

The new Planet Fitness gym opened up near me a few weeks ago. So Jim and I signed up and to tell you the truth I was dreading having to start working out. I am at my basic core lazy! The idea of sweating and hurting is just not for me. Yuck.

But when Jack started back to school two weeks ago, Jim and I started working out. I usually do 30 minutes of the circuit training and then 30 minutes on the treadmill. I have actually come to shall I say, enjoy it! Who woulda thunk it. And I am feeling better and thinking clearer than I ever did before. So it is a good thing.

I am also following the Weight Watchers diet of counting my points. I am not going to the meetings because I have been there, done that already. But I am following the diet and eating what I should to hopefully lose weight.

And the results after two weeks of working out almost every day and eating right? I have lost two whole pounds! Yippie! It is so not fair. I am convinced it is because I am in my 40s and pre-menopausal and my body is holding on to the fat for dear life. Sigh. But I will not let it get me down. I am enjoying the results from the exercise, but I just wanted to say - NO FAIR!

Church...The New High School?

I have been thinking lately just how alike church congregations and high school are alike. At least in my church.

For the past almost three years, we have been getting together with a group of people almost every Friday night for a small group experience of fellowship and bible study. When it started it was only four couples who had small children, so we all had a lot in common. Well it grew and grew and grew to where it became a small church gathering with close to 40 people every Friday night. And that is where the problems started.

First of all you have those people who think they are the most important, do the most for the church, the church couldn't run without them. One person even told me that she was a "mover and a shaker" of the church. They also believe that their poop don't stink. Among these types, it seems like there is a contest to see who can do the most "stuff" at church.

Then you have the "cool kids" and some of these people are also in the group I just described above. They are the ones that "everybody" thinks are so fun to be around. They are the "life of the party" and have all the other "cool kids" over to their house for all the "cool parties". You know like the jock or the cheerleader in high school. But they only associate with the "cool kids" that they deem are "fun" enough for their little "cool kids" get-togethers. They also feel that actually doing a bible study where you have to actually open a book and read is beneath their "coolness".

There is also those who are the "cool kid" followers, but never actually are elevated to their status. They are so thrilled like a puppy dog to be allowed in their circle every now and then, but are talked about behind their back by the "cool kids" when they are not around, mainly because they just don't measure up in the "coolness" factor.

Then there are the "Nerds" of the church. These are the people who are normal, but may have a deadly "flaw" in the eyes of the other groups. One may like to talk too much about her disease (Multiple Sclerosis) or made the deadly mistake of opening up and sharing a painful part of her past that could be used to gossip about by the other groups. Or there is the guy who was born with a defect and therefore not like the others, making him an easy target of more gossip.

There is the "older" group who basically is anybody above the age of 50 and not to be friendly with because they have nothing in common with this group. As one person said "I am just not going to be friends with an 80-year-old".

And lastly there is the "floater", who befriends everybody, no matter what group you belong to. And this is the group that I like to think I am a part of. In high school, I was a part of this group also, so I guess it just goes to figure that in High School part Two, I would be in the same group.

You are probably wondering why I am going through all this. And it is because we started a new small group formation this week. We split up into smaller groups and started to meet in the homes again. I am hosting one in my home. In this new small group, there is a mixture of "nerds" and "floaters."

There are now three different small groups to choose from and the "movers and shakers" and the "cool kids" have formed their own group. They are not actually going to be studying anything bible related, just getting together for "fellowship" as they call it. I call it a "gossip and I-am-hotter-than-you" session.

But I guess the final straw for me was when all this "church high schoolness" started showing up on Facebook with statuses that are so juvenile and petty. In fact, they are not even high school, they are more like junior high playground worthy.

And in all of this, you noticed I never mentioned God, the most important reason to even have a church. That is because there is no God in all this mess. And I am sure he is very disappointed in his humanity that call themselves "Christian".

Happy Fat Tuesday!

Mardi Gras. Before I moved to the Gulf Coast, I really had no clue what Mardi Gras was or entailed. But ya'll, it is a HUGE Holiday here. I mean business and schools close down and the entire area goes nuts. And the parades. Oh my goodness. The parades! For a month leading up to the big day of Fat Tuesday, there are countless parades all over the coast. We went to one a couple of weeks ago and came home with more Mardi Gras beads than we need. But it is so much fun. As the floats go by, they throw things to the thousands of people ranging from beads, t-shirts, toys, stuffed animals, and candy. And you would be surprised how people are downright mean by shoving people out of the way just so they can get those cheap beads! It is crazy.

I had planned to take the kids to the big Biloxi parade this afternoon, but my stupid non-existent immunity has caught the crud that has been going around the area and the thought of standing out on the side of the street with thousands of other parade-goers just didn't seem as much fun as it did yesterday when I felt better.

However, Jim gets to go to the big one tonight in an official capacity. He gets to try to police all the crazy and drunk people. Hahaha. He should have some stories to tell when he gets home.

Happy Fat Tuesday ya'll! What are you giving up for lent tomorrow? I am giving up diet coke. I thought about giving up sugar, then I laughed. Yeah right with Jack's birthday party this weekend, that ain't gonna happen. So diet coke it is.

Big Announcement

I have a big announcement to make. Jim and I are becoming foster parents to a 15-year-old girl that we met last summer on the youth trip we chaperoned for church. Her name is Brandi and for some reason we made a connection with her. We since learned her story and found out that she has been in the foster care system for the past 6 years ever since she was abandoned by both her parents. Her mother is in prison and her father is not in the least father material. She has been in numerous foster homes and she is currently placed in the Methodist girls home.

It has been a long process with lots of prayers and thoughts leading up to this decision. I feel that God placed Jim and I on that youth trip for this reason and we are supposed to take this girl in. But that doesn't mean that I don't have a lot of fears and reservations about the whole thing. There has been so many times that I have wondered what in the world are we doing? How is this going to affect Jack? How is this going to affect our family? Can I handle being the foster parent of a troubled teenage girl? Am I ready for this commitment?

Tomorrow is the home study and if all goes well, she should be placed in our home within the next week. I am scared, excited, nervous, thoughtful and prayerful all at the same time. I'll keep ya posted on how it goes.

Not going to answer the phone anymore

I have decided that answering our home phone is just an invitation to grief. To make a long story short, when we moved our cell phones from AT&T to Sprint, we did it on the very day that our contract was up. I called that day and talked to AT&T and they said that it was okay to end our service without incurring any more charges. Well that was back in September. Lo and behold with no warning or anything we get a letter from a collection agency saying we owe over $600 to AT&T!!! What? I was so mad that Jim decided it best that he called them. Well after a few phone calls here and there and a couple of days, we got it all straightened out. Seems that we still had 8 hours left on our contract and they were charging us for early termination fees. Don't think so. They finally fessed up and said we did not owe anything. However, their sharks, err the collection agency, did not get the memo and are still after us. Calling every single day. Many times a day. And when we do talk to them, they are downright nasty. And we don't even owe the damn thing! We are this close to getting an attorney.

Well anyway, on top of all that, I just got a phone call from yet another collection agency asking for Jim. Again another nasty person on the other end (do they take nasty tests to get the job?) and said that Jim has defaulted on his XXXX credit card. I am all HUH? He mentioned something about owing $4500 and $2800 on two cards. I tell him that I had no idea what he is talking about. He is extremely nasty and says that we HAVE to pay these balances. I am telling him I don't know what he is talking about. We pay our bills. He then asks me if our address is such and such. Um no never lived at that address. Oh is your husband's middle name Wendell? Um that would be NO also. It wasn't even our debt! Just another guy named James Clayton they are trying to find and is going through the white pages for every James Clayton? And treating them like dog poo? At the end, he literally said "I guess I have the wrong number" and hung up! No apology no nothing. No sorry for me thinking my husband went out and ran up two credit cards with no payment. No sorry for the possible divorce! Just "oops wrong number".

I am giving up answering the phone.

Suicide

I know that is not a pleasant topic, but that is the topic that has been on my mind in the last few days. Not me, but a family member committed suicide a few days ago. My ex-sister-in-law, or to be more exact, my brother's ex-wife. She left behind their 15-year-old son, Chad. Through the years that she and my brother were married, I saw her here and there. I remember going to visit them when Chad was about three months old. Of course, I was in my early 20s at the time and my mothering days would be way off. But to this day, I remember the way she loved that baby. She absolutely adored Chad. And now all these years later, I now know that feeling of loving another human being beyond belief.

Laurie was such a vibrant person. She literally lit up a room when she walked in. She never went anywhere without being fully made up and dressed to a T, which was a stark contrast to me in jeans and t-shirts and no makeup half the time. I usually felt like the ugly duckling sister-in-law next to her. But her personality and vibrance made it seem not so bad.

In March when we had a family reunion here at my house, she was generous enough to bring Chad here when my brother could not or would not for various reasons. I will always be thankful and grateful to her for doing that. For the first time, Jack got to meet his cousin Chad and to this day, Jack talks about cousin Chad almost daily. I also got to reconnect with Laurie and have some good old-fashioned girl talk with her while eating spicy shrimp and crawfish. Fun times.

Two days prior to her suicide, I was online talking to her about the possibility of meeting up with her and Chad in January when we go to Disneyworld. She was looking forward to that meeting. I only wish I knew what was going on in her head between that conversation online and when she decided to end it all. I know she was in pain. She had to be to leave Chad like that. I know that I am one of many who are wondering why and how today. One of many who are thinking and feeling "If Only". Laurie, I hope you are somewhere in peace today.

And if there is anything that I have learned out of all this, is that life is so precious. We must hug our kids a little tighter and tell them we love them that much more. We also must tell our friends and family that they are special to us and let them know how much we love them. You never know what tomorrow will bring.

Rest in peace Laurie. We will love you and miss you always.

Another Victim of the Economy

I just heard that the indoor playland that we used to frequent when Jack was younger is closing up shop because people just are not paying $6 to come and play. I know the owner and she said that people just stopped coming in right after the financial crisis/bailout began. It really is sad because she just moved to a bigger, nicer location. It was painted so very cute and had a ton of fun things to do for the toddler set. But, alas, she is closing at the end of the month. Just another sign of the financial crisis.

In other news, I am once again a true soccer mom. Tonight is the first night of soccer practice for the boy. We are all set with the ball, shin guards, shoes and everything a soccer star needs. Not too sure I am all that thrilled to stand out on a cold soccer field at 6:00 tonight for an hour, but I guess ya gotta do what ya gotta do for your kids.

Why I Have Twelve Loads of Laundry Piled Up...

So today, I think I did 8 loads of laundry. Give or take. I think I lost count somewhere after four, but it was a lot. I even cleaned out my sock/underwear drawer. Aren't you proud of me?

But that gets me back to the reason why my husband had to ask me if I could get him some clean underwear out because there were none to be found in his underwear drawer. And that reason is that I realized today that I am crazy busy. I have two part-time jobs and about to start a third one. I work part-time as a bookkeeper while Jack is in school a few mornings a week. I also sell Uppercase Living (really cool product). And I am about to start another bookkeeping job for friends who own a construction company. So three part-time jobs. But wait, not done yet. Me and my big mouth said yes this year to taking over the treasurer job at the church, which is kinda like another part-time job, just not paid. Oh but that's not all, I also donate my time to helping the youth group at church every Sunday night. Oh and to make my life even busier, I signed Jack up for soccer which starts next week with practices every Tuesday night and the games will be every Saturday morning for about three months.

And somewhere in all that, I have to be mother to a very energetic four-year-old, wife, chef, caretaker to five animals, maid, and yes laundry person! I think I just made myself tire. I need to go lie down.

After Election Thoughts

First off I want to say that I am proud of America that we can look past racial issues and elect a black man. I am equally proud that we were thiiiisss close to having a woman in the white house, whether president or vice-president. I think that really does say that we as a collective can look beyond what the person is, but who the person is. Something that America could not do when I was born. We have come a long way.

However, Mr. Obama, simply scares me. I truly believe that our founding fathers were brilliant when they drafted the constitution. And when I hear Mr. Obama say that he wants the Supreme Court to change the constitution to become more "distributive" and spread the wealth, I am scared. Very scared. The constitution is what has made America great since the beginning. It sets us apart. It makes all men equal with the ability to pursuit happiness. It gives us the freedom of speech, religious freedom, and justice and liberty for all. Those words are not just words, they are the foundation to this great country. The American dream is to work hard and pursuit success and happiness. It does not mean that the government automatically grants you financial wealth, it means you have equal opportunity to make something of yourself as everybody else. Mr. Obama wants to take that away from us. He wants to spread our wealth around. He wants to take away the drive to make oneself greater. And to some degree, I am confident, he will get his way. Which brings me back to being scared. Because if he can change the constitution in that regard, what else can change? My freedom to worship my God the way that I want? My freedom to write this blog saying that I am scared? My freedom all together?

We must not forget what the constitution stands for. We have to continue to teach it in schools. Our children must know that our founding fathers wanted this country to be the best in the world. The idea that people governing the people was so completely foreign at that time, it was revolutionary. And we can not lose our freedom. We can not lose our dream. We can not lose America, no matter who the president is.

Not so Discombobulated

I am feeling much better these days. I finally got rid of that super bug that loved me so much, it hung around for 5 weeks. My house is clean once again. Last Sunday after church, I told Jim that it was time to bust our butts and get this house in a much more healthy state. Yay no more dust bunnies living in the corners and all spider webs are declared gone, the real ones, not the fake decorations.

How is it that today is Halloween? Of course we are planning to go out trick or treating. Jack has chosen to be the red power ranger. How he knows about power rangers, I do not know, because as far as I know he has never watched that show. But he is going around saying "Power Rangers Jungle Fury." And we did it again. Our neighbor's little girl Allison, chose to be the pink power ranger and Jack chose to be the red power ranger. This follows up from last year of her being batgirl to Jack's batman. We really did not plan for them to dress alike, it just worked out that way again. Anyway, there should be mighty cute pictures coming tomorrow of the two of them.

I also have pictures of our second annual visit to the corn maze last weekend. It was a lot of fun and we made it through the maze with Jack leading us at every turn. I will post those also tomorrow.

In other news, I joined facebook the other day. I was out with some girlfriends on Saturday and they were telling me that I just HAD to join, so I had to look it up. Who knew how fun facebook could be? I have found long lost friends and a few not so long lost. Fun times. Another thing to obsess over on the internet.

Discombobulated

That is how I have been feeling for over a month now. I am STILL fighting the superbug from hell. It is now going on five weeks since I started feeling sick. I have the horrendous cough that is entirely too embarrassing when out in public. Yeah it sounds like I am going to hack up a lung in the very near future. I am also completely and utterly exhausted. I have not felt this tired since Jack was a newborn and you are supposed to feel like crap. Even Jim came down with some crud and was pretty much over it in three days. Wahhh! Not that I don't want him to get over the sickies, I just want to do it too.

Anyway, needless to say life has been feeling a bit discombobulated lately. There are other factors that have led to this feeling.

1. Jim's mother, Grammy C., has been in the hospital for over a week now. She is not doing well and has a lot of problems, with the major one being diagnosed with kidney cancer. She is 86 years old and up until now was going unbelievably strong. But she is not going to have any surgery or any treatment. She is going home to get her "affairs in order" and spend some more time with her family and friends. We support her decision and understand it. But we are going to miss her when that time comes and spend as much time as we can up there.

2. The house is a mess. I mean it is bordering on health hazard right now. I hate the feeling when there is chaos going on in the house. And this house is chaotic right now!

3. What is going on in the world right now. It seems like the world is ending with all this financial mess. I don't know what that means to my family. I think we are pretty safe, but ya never know. And should we cancel our Disney trip in January? We have a good portion saved for the trip, but should we just keep that money? But then the memories and the look on Jack's face on Big Thunder Mountain is priceless.

4. I have been gaining weight during this sickness because I have been doing the bare minimal of going to work, shopping for the bare essentials (toilet paper when we had not one square in the house) and parenting to Jack. In between all of that, I have sat or laid my butt in the family usually moaning to some degree. I have been taking vitamins and eating lots of fruit high in anti-oxidants and C in hopes to actually fight this bug. But when that day comes that I actually feel human again, I will get back to walking the dog, and exercising.

5. Our puppy Molly, has been chewing up the house. She chewed up the ottomon to my rocker. It is ugly now. I don't know if I can reupholster it or not. She also has trashed my furniture after she comes in from outside and has flthy paws from digging up the yard. She then has to jump on every single piece of furniture in the house leaving little muddy paw prints. I just realized that this one has a lot to do with #2 above.

Anyway, it has just been a hard time here in the Jackaroo house. But Jack is the bright spot in all of our lives with his constant singing and the why questions. Love that kid. I just don't know how to tell him that Grammy C is going to die soon. He still brings up Bob, our dog we had to put down in June. He misses him and is asking me why we had to bury his body. He must be thinking about Grammy C's death because he is always asking about people being buried and why we bury them and what happens after they die. All tough questions to answer a four-year-old.

Thoughts and Other Random Tid Bits

I realize that I have not been keeping my blog posting up lately. In fact this entire year has been pretty pathetic in the posting department. Maybe that is just part of the life of a blog. I have been doing this for over four years and that is a long time. I have some online friends that have watched my child and I have watched their children grow from little babies to full-fledged four-year-old kids. Where has the time gone?

I have become a news junkie. In the past week, Fox news has been on just about 24/7. I think this whole financial mess is despicable. I remember "back in the day" people had to have an actual down payment to buy a house, but then it became people didn't need a down payment and could take out 2 or more mortgages on their house. It just baffles me and now we all are suffering because of it.

Another news junkie item is Sarah Palin. I just have to say that I want to be like her when I grow up (even though she and I are very very close in age). She has it going on. She is smart and articulate and very capable in my opinion of being a leader. And I believe the media has done a hatchet job on her and it is entirely not fair. Oh and she has really cool glasses. If I have to wear glasses, I want to wear hers.

Jack has been singing a lot in school. He comes home with these so adorable and cute songs about Jesus and being a Christian. One of the projects I want to do this weekend is get him on video singing some of these songs for ya'll. He also is learning about vowels and consonants. He does get them mixed up and this morning he was out and out fighting me by saying that "L" is a vowel. I kept trying to tell him that it is not a vowel, but a consonant. He actually started to cry as he was trying to convince me otherwise. Just one more reason of the many reasons that I could never home school my child. I am not against homeschooling, but for me and my child - no way in the world would it work.

Superbugs. I am still fighting mine that I have had for the past three weeks that feel like months. I went to the doctor two weeks ago and this perky little doctor told me that I only had a viral infection and I was at the "tail end of it." Um don't think so. I went back to the doctor (not the perky little one) and it turns out that I now have bronchitis and strep throat. Gee is that why I have been feeling like crud barely making it through each day, even though I was at the "tail end of it." I walked out with no less than SEVEN prescriptions.

We are praying for Grammy C. tonight. She is in the hospital suffering from a severe bladder infection and they are running some tests. She is such an inspiration because at 86, she gets around and is better dressed than any of us. I hope that I am as good as her at 66. We just hope she feels better soon. Jack loves to play tea parties with her and at 86, she gets down on the floor and plays cars with him. Feel better soon Grammy!

Sad Day

This was a very sad day. Jim and I attended the funeral of a fallen police officer. There were about 1000 people with hundreds of police officers from all over. I have put myself in Rob's wife's place a thousand times over the past few days. By the grace of God, it was not me sitting in the front row looking at her dead husband's casket. She has two children the same ages as Jack and Laura. Her son, Trevor, just didn't get it, I could tell. But that is probably a good thing. How do you tell a five-year-old that his Daddy is never coming home. I also kept thinking that his daughter will never have a father walk her down that aisle on her wedding day. It is just beyond sad. I have no words to describe the emotions of today.

After the funeral, we drove in the funeral procession to the gravesite. Jim and I were in his patrol car with the lights going, just one of hundreds of patrol cars, fire trucks, and ambulances that made its way through the streets of Gulfport. It seemed incredibly surreal as the people lined the road with American flags, signs and were saluting us as we drove through. The fire department had a huge American flag drapped over the ladder that we all drove under. Very surreal.

At the gravesite, they played Taps, had the gun salute, and bagpipes playing Amazing Grace. It was incredible to see all the police officers in their dress uniforms saluting the casket as it went by. And the saddest part of all was at the end when dispatch called out the last call to Rob on the radio. "Gulfport 107 ... Gulfport 107... silence and then "Gulfport all units Officer 107 is now 10-7" which means officer is out of service. The sobs rang out throughout the graveyard. There was one officer who was standing beside us who literally dropped to his knees sobbing. And my husband next to me was sobbing as was I. I have to say that I am so proud of my husband for the job he does. It scares the crap out of me everytime he walks out of this house in uniform, but I am so incredibly proud of him. He chooses to put himself in danger every night to help all of us. And I know that every single wife there today felt the same way about her husband and also thanking God that we have our husbands tonight, while Leslie does not.

This is one day that will live with me forever and I hope and pray that I never have to relive another policeman funeral, especially my own policeman

If you are the praying kind...

just say a prayer for Lt. Rob Curry's family. He is the police officer who died yesterday in the line of duty. Here is a link to the story. He was on his motorcycle and was hit by a woman trying to turn left by crossing three lanes of traffic. She said she didn't see him and was quite hysterical at the accident scene, so say a prayer for her also as I am sure this is devastating to her as well. Rob's wife, Leslie, is also a police Lt. and has given us many clothes for Jack that her son has outgrown. I feel so bad for her and can't even imagine the pain that she is going through right now and their two children. The entire Gulfport police force and community are very shaken up by this death and is the second police officer to die in two weeks. Again, I just pray everyday that I never receive that phone call. Just something you live with when you love a cop.

Ramblings

Wow three posts in one day. A record for this year I do believe.

These past two weeks have been very drama-filled. Laura went back to California last Wednesday. It was very sad to see her go. After all the drama surrounding her request to stay here and her mother's response, it was a let down to say the least. We are being forced to pursuit legal recourse and maybe having to go to California to appear in court soon.

It also has been a very sad time for Jim. One of his fellow police officers was on vacation in North Carolina and was shot and murdered in a motel parking lot. It turns out that two teenagers came up to rob him and he identified himself as a police officer and they shot him on the spot, probably because he was a cop. As Jim said, they are probably being heralded as heroes because they killed a cop. It makes me very sad, nervous, and angry that there is a portion of the population out there who want my husband dead just because he is a cop. His funeral was last weekend and it was a huge thing here because he was also in the Air Force reserves and he received a full military funeral and the entire police force was there as well. Very very sad.

And then we just learned another one of Jim's fellow police officers was killed today in an accident. I don't know the details, whether it was while on duty or not, but it is so sad. His wife is also a police officer and they had two children aged 5 and 11. In fact, she is the one who gave us so many clothes for Jack. I can't even imagine going on with life after that. As soon as I heard about it, I started to cry for her and her children.

With all of this, it makes you appreciate the ones you have around you. I also have to pray that I never get that phone call. It is a prayer that I say everyday he walks out the door in uniform.

Since When Did ...

cell phones become so confusing? Our 2 year contract is up soon with what used to be Cingular Wireless and is now At&T for our cell phones. I did like them when they were Cingular, but since AT&T took over, the customer service has gone down the tubes. So we are now looking for a new company, plan, and phones for Jim and I.

And I have to ask, when did it all become so confusing and expensive! Jim's little flip phone is on its last legs by not being able to keep a charge for more than a day and I really like the new smart phones with the all the new features. So I was looking at the Palm Centro at Sprint, which comes in pink (hehe love it) and think it is a good phone with all kinds of bells and many whistles. But while we were looking at Sprint, I saw the new Instinct, which is not that much more than the Palm phone. Now if money were no object, I would own an iphone by now after playing with Jim's sister's phone for like an hour. It is just that $400 price tag that has turned me off. But the new Instinct is way cool and very close to the iphone and have rethunk my position on the whole cell phone thing.

It is all so confusing and overwhelming with so many plans, companies and a gazillion different phones these days. Another thing that makes me old when I say "back in my day, we did not have any cell phones, texting, or email at our fingertips." How did we survive? I ask myself.

Today I Wanna Be

Jack is always telling me what he wants to do when he "grows up". Everytime I hear him say that, I always think of the Toys R Us jingle "I wanna be a toys r us kid". Anyway, for the longest time the boy wanted to be a "race car driver". Seriously everyday, about a hundred times a day, he would say I wanna be a race car driver just like my cousin Chad. (Thanks Chad!). I always told him he had to go to college first, so after awhile, he would add the little caveat to his dream - "after college" and then he would ask me again "when is college". I would again go through all the schools he has to finish before becoming that race car driver (preschool, elementary, junior high, high, and then college).

Well in recent weeks, Jack's fascination has moved from race car driving (thank goodness) to being a rock star (oh geesh). And I have the Disney channel to thank for this latest obsession because of their non-ending promotion of the movie Camp Rock. He will go around the house strumming his imaginary guitar and say "I am a Rocking Star Mom!". Even at church he will stand up during the kid's song worship and pretend to play the guitar. At this point I am really not sure which is the worst idea - race car driver or rock star. But of course, everything is "after college".

So yesterday, he went to the doctor to have his hand checked out, which by the way is looking really good. I am no longer feeling faint when I have to change the bandage. The doctor thinks it is going to heal up very nicely with probably no surgery (yahoo!). But we have to give it another couple of weeks to make sure. So that was good news.

Anyway, while at the doctor's, I guess he had the sudden inspiration that doctors were as cool as race car drivers and rock stars because he now says he wants to be a doctor, which is something I can live with a lot easier than the previous two career choices. There is just the little matter of how to pay for med school is all.

I just think it is so great to be young and have your entire future ahead of you and a blank slate as to what you are going to do with that future.

In other happenings, our Vacation Bible School started last night. After last year's first night chaos, I was fully prepared for that same chaos. However, it ran so smoothly and I think the kids enjoyed it very well. This year, I am helping out in the science "discovery" room where we are doing science experiments to demonstate God's love. It is really fun to see the expressions on their faces when doing the experiments. My friend Nichol, who is a pediatrician, is my "lab partner" and she even brought lab coats for us to wear. All very cool. I will take the camera and get some pictures of the church all decorated. We have been working hard getting ready for this. We were at the church until 10:00 on Friday night and then again on Sunday night. But I think it is going to be a successful VBS this year.

Bob 1991-2008

Today I had to put to sleep my dog of almost 17 years. Bob, my wire-haired dachshund that I picked out when I was only 24 years old, which was about 3 lifetimes ago. Through a marriage, a divorce, a bad relationship, my single years, meeting Jim and having Jack, Bob was there as always. My faithful friend who stuck with me through it all. He lived in three different states, 6 houses and 3 apartments with me. And today I had to say goodbye to him. In the end he was completely deaf and almost blind, but when he knew that he was getting a treat, he still pranced around like a puppy. I knew this day was coming and I thought I was ready for it, but I still cried like I lost a dear friend. He was my first son before I had Jack and he will be missed.

I love you Bobers.

The Finger Saga Continues

We are still managing with burnt fingers here at the Jackaroo house. The boy is such a trooper. I am completely impressed with him and his pain management. It makes me think I am a total wimp to pain, because if I had the same injury, I would be complaining about the thing all the time. But not Jack, he just goes about his day and doesn't let the fact that he has no use of his left hand get in his way. He even has accomplished the taking his pants off to go potty quite well with the one hand.

The actual injury is looking better than it did on Saturday when I almost lost my lunch. I changed the dressing yesterday and I can see the healing process going on. The human body really is quite amazing. I am actually going to take him over to a nurse friend today to have her look at it and see what she thinks and let her change the dressing for me. It will be nice to have a professional do it rather than me who about faints away. Yeah a medical career was never in the cards for me.

I also have such a great group of friends. It really was quite amazing that I only told one person about the incident and before the night was over, I had like five phone calls from friends wondering how he was doing. I feel very blessed to have such great girlfriends who I know I can count on in times like these.

Oh and the other day at Walmart, the boy did not get a video game system. One big reason was because I just don't want to have one in my house and well he couldn't play anyway. But we did end up getting a couple of games - Hungry Hungry Hippos and Candy Land. We have been having fun playing those and Chutes and Ladders and Sorry. There isn't much else the boy can do besides watch tv and I really don't want him to watch tv all day long. Unfortunately the pool is out for at least two or three weeks, along with the beach, and the waterpark, and playing outside. But he is taking it better than me! It just goes to show you that you can learn something from your kids.

The Boy Has Me Wrapped Around His Finger ...

especially the bad fingers. Today I changed the dressing on Jack's hand. I got out of it yesterday by pushing the job off onto Jim, but since Jim is sleeping today, I had to do the deed. Let me tell you, I am by no stretch of the imagination a nurse. I cut off the bandage as gingerly and gently as I could, but it still hurt a lot, I could tell. When I took a look at the fingers, I literally felt like throwing up and my knees got weak. They are ugly and look horrible, much worse than the day it happened because now all the skin is falling off like the doctor said it would. It is basically a very bad burn. When I had to put the antibiotic ointment on, he yelled and howled. I can just imagine how much it hurts him and I kept telling him not to look at the hand, but to look out the window at the birdies. I just wish I could of looked out the window at the birdies too! Anyway, I could not wrap that hand up faster, both for the boy's sake and mine own. Yuckie! I am thinking I am going to take him to a nurse friend's tomorrow and have her do the daily job of changing the dressing.

So because I have been basically feeling guilty and sorry for the boy because he has no use of the hand, I am going to take him to Walmart and let him pick something out. I asked him if he wanted to get a new movie or toy and he comes up with this: "I know. I have a great idea. Let's get a video game! One that you play on the tv! Isn't that a great idea?" Now I really do not believe in video games at all. I think they are a huge time waster and once they come into the house, the kids don't want to do anything but that. But because the boy has me wrapped around his very badly hurt fingers at the moment, I actually thought seriously about getting some video game something for him for a second there. We'll see. Who knows, I may just be worn down, but then again, he can't really play with just one hand very easily.

As I said before, this mother thing is not easy at all!