Not Feeling It

This is for Amy, who emailed me asking if I ever just did not feel like blogging and my big answer to her is a big yes. (By the way, you will be getting a reply email from me hehe).

There are a bunch of reasons for it. One big reason is computer issues. Our computer is currently having some major issues and I am on the old old computer that is 8 years old right now. I have been looking at those nice new snazzy looking laptops, however money right now is just not there to get it so here I am on my old machine.

I have also had my carpal tunnel come back pretty good in my left hand. Every now and then it will flare up and right now it is flaring pretty good making typing not feel so good.

Then I feel like I am in a state of flux. I have been saying goodbye to Jack's baby years and knowing that I am never going to have another baby, which is fine with me, but just saying good bye to my baby and seeing him grow into a big kid has been kind of hard for me. I love the big kid that he has grown into and he is so much fun at this age, but a small part of me has been mourning his baby stage. I guess I have been melancholy about that and knowing that I have to move on to the next stage in his life. I can already see how much school influences him just by his vocabulary (both good and bad). He is learning so much there and I am so proud of him. He is a very sweet child and I hope to keep him that way.

But at the same time, I am also celebrating the fact that I no longer have to deal with formula, spit ups, diapers, 3 am feedings, no sleep, and all that other stuff that comes with babies. I don't know what it was, but turning 40 pretty much cured me of the want for any more babies. For the first time in over 10 years, I am not yearning to become pregnant. Also, the show Jon and Kate plus 8 has cured me of ever having sex again. How do they do it? All that whining and screaming - geesh. I know I maybe cursing myself here for saying this, but Jack has truly moved on from the whining stage for the most part, unless he is just too tired. I remember when he turned three and it seemed like for 6 months there, the whining did not stop ever, and I wanted to tear my hair out, or his. But he is just a happy little boy who does what I ask him to do (for the most part) and I don't think I could ask for a better little boy. Thank God I don't have 8 of them!

So that pretty much sums up what has been going on. I have also been contemplating going back to work part-time to help with the non-existant money situation, which is another whole post altogether. Until then, hope ya'll have a great day. Now I have to go walk my butt off, literally.